14 September 2006

• "Do not try this at home." --Dr. Rebecca Denova, on epispasm
• "Now you worship Zeus-George." --Denova, on Alexander the Great
  
• "*******'s like a Pringles can--once she pops, she can't stop." --Tom Wolfel
• "**** is like a garbage can of emotion." --Tom

13 September 2006

• "Why did God need a bed?" --Prof. Don Bialostosky, on Plato

12 September 2006

• "We're not talking about peace, love and organic food." --Dr. Rebecca Denova, on kings
• "I am the Big Cheese." --Denova, on God

11 September 2006

• "I wasn't trying to be correct, just annoying." --Jimmy Keener, on talking
  

9 September 2006

• "I am Nordenbot 9000." --Jerry May, on Chancellor Nordenberg
• "You're sitting--I'm standing. My feet are tired--you don't have feet." --Jason Pippi, on cripples
  

8 September 2006

• "They have our river." --Jerry May
  "Yeah, but we started it." --Alex Moore; on the River City Rivalry

5 September 2006

• "The tough one's raining frogs." --Dr. Rebecca Denova, on plagues
• "I bet that was a tough one for the papers: dead mayor, Ben's out." --Denova, on news and football
  

2 September 2006

• "That'd be awesome, if I had a player piano." --Cara O'Shea
  "It'd be awesome if you were a player piano." --Katie
  "Yeah, but then I couldn't drink milk." --Cara; on music
  

31 August 2006

• "Try to bar--students often leave them there." --Dr. Rebecca Denova, on the Bible
• "Okay, hon', anything to make you happy." --Denova, on Biblical sex customs
  
• "Darth Vader, you're not scary in half." --Jason Pippi, on Darth Vader
• "How about we masturbate with sandpaper?" --Phil Boggs
  "Funny story . . ." --Pippi; on boredom
• "Exploding firework vagina crabs to 'my grandmother.'" --Erin Offord, on transitions
• "To see if they won indoor plumbing." --Pippi, on ritual marking
• "Like the little fur things, in a package from Land's End." --Cara O'Shea, on Eskimos

28 August 2006

• "Have you looked into it yet?" --Cara
  "No, it's the first day of school." --Jon Meck; on study abroad
  

undated

• "Alright, we'll give you PPG and the Steel Building for the Space Needle and Shaun Alexander." --Jerry May, on sports trades
• "I have, like, 5,000 pens in my pocket. [reveals] You thought I was lying, didn't you?" --Jerry
  "Ooo!" --Erin and Cara, lunging
• "Mine is supercalafragilisticexpealagittarius." --Cara, on zodiac signs and Cancer
• "If it were priesthood or *******, I'd say, 'I love you, Jesus.'" --Pippi
• "Which left you with the Monday Night Football Theme Song." --Katie, on Phil and country music
• "Hitler is right after Bob Saget!" --Erin, on Katie's lists